Eric and I had dated off and on for a couple years. In fact I lived with him for 10 months. But then he wants to get too close. You know, wants me to commit to seeing only him and I can't do that. Still, he told me I could call on him any time. That he didn't want to lose touch with me all together.
Well, geez, we only live a few blocks from each other, I'd pass him on the street driving to work. And I did call him. Once when it was pouring down rain and I locked my keys in the car. And once when I came home after having a few too many drinks, I couldn't find my house keys and it was late. So I walked to his house and pounded on the door. He let me in, and I slept with him and we fucked, but then soon as he helped me find my keys (in my other pocket) I split and that was that. He called me up a couple times to ask me out, but I've never agreed to go out with him.
This last Wednesday, I was supposed to go to this business dinner with my boss and an important client. I almost called Eric, but then Bill, a co-worker, asked if I'd accompany him and I said ok. I mean, I knew his wife is pregnant, but it's not like we were going to Do anything.
Only when we were at dinner, I saw Eric across the room. I could've melted right into the floor with the look he gave me, but hey, it was a public place and I have as much right to be here as anybody, right?
He called me right as I got home from work Thursday night. "Hey, Cathie, what's the big idea of going out with Bill. You know he's married, and I would've gladly gone with you."
"Yeah, I know, but I also know it won't lead to something else, because he is married. So, it just seemed safer."
There was a long silence at the other end of the line. "You know how I feel about you. I'm the one who really cares, honey, and I hate seeing the way you're treating yourself." There was nothing I could say to that, I mean, who did he think he was, my dad? So I said, "Well, if you really want me to, I'll go out with you again."
"How about tomorrow night?"
Silence, "Uh, ok, tomorrow night."
"Rossini's. I'll meet you there at 7."
"All right." I hung up, but then it kinda pissed me off. I mean, who does he think he is? He can just call me up for a date anytime he wants and I'm supposed to come running? So I changed real quick and headed to the corner bar and met up with Jack. We always have a good time.
It was too good a time, in fact, and I woke up Friday morning with a whopper of a hangover. Damn it, I didn't think I'd make it through the day, but by noon felt a little better. Only I was so swamped with work I hadn't kept caught up with all week, I ended up staying a little past quitting time. Drove home, stripped off all my clothes down to my panties and threw on an old tee shirt. I was lying on the couch with a blanket pulled up to my chin watching TV, and there was a loud knocking on my door. Holy Shit! I was supposed to meet Eric at Rossini's! Well, it's already 8:00, too late now.
"Damn it, Cathie. We had a date." I let him in. "Yeah, I'm sorry. I was tired and I forgot." I sat back down on the couch while he stood there looking frustrated and angry.
"I can't do this anymore. You're either going to have to get completely out of my life, or I'm going to go crazy. You have to decide whether you want to be my friend or not."
"I am your friend, Eric."
"No, I'm yours. Whenever you call and need me I'm there. But you are no kind of friend to me. I can't depend on you, I can't get close to you. You can't even keep a date with me, and leave me sitting in a restaurant by myself waiting for you. Just do me a favor and don't ever call me again. I've had enough."
He turned and walked out the door and suddenly I panicked. Shit, I can't let him leave like that. I jumped up, pulled the door shut behind me and saw him driving down the street away from me. I just started walking, no started running for his house. It's only a couple blocks and then across the vacant lot. He was just on the porch, putting the key in the lock as I came running up the walk.
"Please, Eric. Don't just leave like that."
"What do you want from me, Cathie? It's obvious you don't want what I want to give. And I can't just keep going on like this. You have to make a choice here." He turned to go into the house. Damn, it was chilly, and I just realized I still have on just my panties and an old tee shirt.
"Eric, Please. You know it scares me when you get too close." He just paused. "Yeah, I've heard that story a hundred times. About your parents' shitty marriage and how your womanizing Dad ran around the whole time he was married. But, all men aren't like that." "Well, yeah, I know."
He turned to look at me. "Do you? I've not been with another woman since I've fallen for you. Yet, you still hook up with the first guy you find who wants to hop in the sack. I can't live like that any more."
I turned away as he went into the house and shut the door. Damn it, now what am I supposed to do? I didn't know, so I just sat down on the top step on his porch.
"What's the matter, lock your key in the house?" "Yeah. Can I come in?"
"No. No you can't, Cathie, not unless you agree to stay here with me for the whole weekend." Hmmm. The whole weekend just meant til Sunday night.
"Ok, I will."
"You're sure. You won't slip out in the middle of the night or anything."
"I can't. I'm locked out of my house, remember?"
He just stood aside and held the door open for me. As I stepped into the welcoming warmth, he was taking off his jacket. "Why don't you take a shower to warm up and I'll fix us something to eat."
When I got out of the shower and dried and brushed out my long brown hair, I suddenly realized I have no clothes here anymore, so walked down to the kitchen stark naked. He was sitting at the table with bowls of soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. "I, uh, don't have any clothes here."
"I've seen you naked before." We ate in silence, I suddenly realized I was starved. Then he picked up the dirty plates and wiped off the table, and I stood to take my cup to the sink. He pulled me close and gave me a luscious kiss. Oh, I do love his kisses. And his dark hair and blue eyes, and that cute dimple in his cheek. He reached behind him and turned off the light.
"You need a mentor or something."
"I need a lot of things. You mean a keeper?"
"Uh, huh. Someone to help you straighten out your life and keep you on an even keel."