I woke up early, probably because the couch I was on did not lend itself well to comfortable sleeping. I lay there, staring at the ceiling as it slowly grew brighter with morning sunlight, wondering what was next for me. The day before, on that very couch, I had broken up with my girlfriend Marie. After around three years our relationship had been on the rocks for a while. Nothing dramatic, just the usual boredom and falling out love. For her it seemed that mediocre love was preferable to loneliness, I disagreed. So I had broken my decision to her yesterday afternoon. We spent some time talking about it, she cried a lot and while she tried to get me to change my mind, I had remained firm and she eventually gave up. Offering to sleep on the couch seemed only fair, considering I had just dealt her such a blow.
Given the state we'd left things in yesterday, I was somewhat surprised to see her up quite early, and I felt a sinking in my stomach as I saw the resolute expression on her face as she came out into the living room. Perhaps I had been hasty in thinking that she had surrendered.
"Good morning," I said, still hoping I was wrong.
"Alex, we need to talk," she said, confirming that I was, in fact, not wrong.
"Look, Mari--"
"I know, you don't want to be with me anymore," she held up a hand, cutting me off, "But I'm not willing to give up. Please, just talk to me."
I sighed as I sat up, setting my feet on the floor. Her voice was not steady, but her eyes did not waver. It was going to be a long Sunday.
"Alright," I said, resigned, "Sit down and let's talk."
I was absolutely confident there was nothing she could say that would sway me. I take a long time to make decisions like this one, but I am rarely moved once I've settled on a course. I shifted to make room on the couch, but she sat on the floor before me, cross-legged.
"So, I feel I was pretty clear yesterday and nothing has changed for me. What is it you want to say?"
She took a deep breath.
"I want you to tell me what I can do to make you change your mind. I know that --" she gave me a smirk as she tried to think of how I would phrase this, "-- I know my position is weak here. You want freedom and I can't stop you. But that's why... that's why I'm willing to change, to be the one that gives something up. Just tell me what I need to do to keep you."
I was silent for a moment as I considered her words. She was right, I was the one who wanted to end the relationship. I had thought she was unhappy as well, but perhaps I had underestimated her fear of being alone. She had often joked that if we broke up, she would probably die alone, maybe it wasn't as much of a joke as I thought.
"Marie... Obviously I still care about you a lot and I hope that we can remain friends. But offering to change yourself is not a good idea. That sort of thing never works out long term, true colors always show through."
"Always? Aren't you the big willpower guy? Didn't you tell me that people can do incredible things if they want something enough? I'm telling you now, I -- I want you enough. There has to be something, anything, I could do to make you take me back. You're the best thing that ever happened to me. Are you really telling me there's nothing in the world that could change your mind?"
Looking down at her, wavy red hair framing her pale face, I had to hide a smile behind my hand. I guess after several years she certainly knew me, that was a pretty good argument to use on me. I decided to give her proposition some serious thought, our years together had earned her at least that much. Was there anything she could do that would change my mind? My eyes stared off into space, as though I might find an answer on an invisible horizon. I had, of course, already considered whether there was any path forward in the relationship before deciding to end it, but that was when I had assumed she would meekly accept my decision. I have always had the problem of being a bit too honest and perhaps too thorough. Of course there was something she could do that would change my mind, something that was technically within the realm of what a human could do, but completely outside of actual possibility. My face must have betrayed my thoughts because she instantly perked up, leaning forward a bit.
"There is something! Tell me what it is, please! Anything!"
"There is nothing that you would actually want to do, Marie." Problematic honesty.
"You don't know that! Just say it, who knows what'll happen? What could I do?"
I sighed again, closed my eyes for a moment as I decided if I wanted to go through with this. Now that she realized there was a way forward, she would never give it up. I straightened my back, hardened my voice and opened my eyes.
"You can get on your knees and beg. You can say that you'll do anything I want, forever. That you'll never refuse me. That you'll cease being an independent person and become my obedient pet."
When someone asks you for something you don't want to give them, you can of course just refuse. In my opinion though that leaves up the possibility of being convinced. It's better to just ask for something absolutely ridiculous. Something that no one would ever be willing to give, it sounds crazy now but later she would--
"Okay."
I blinked, looking down at her.
"Okay? Okay what?" I asked, incredulous.
"I'll do it. I'll... do all that stuff you said."
I admit, I had not expected this.
"I don't mean for an hour, or a day. I mean forever."
Light BDSM had been an occasional, sporadic theme for us. She would get into the idea, we would try some things, we would buy some equipment or learn some techniques but then it would fade. She always lost interest in it just as I was getting into it.
"I know," she said, "Forever is exactly what I want. If this is what I have to give up to stay with you, then that's what I'll do."
For such a timid girl, she could sure put on a determined face when she wanted to. Still, this turn of events was unexpected to the point of being unbelievable to me. I supposed there were two possibilities. The absurd: that she would follow through. The more likely: that she would keep this up until she inevitably got sick of it. Thinking about these possibilities, I decided I might as well take her up on it. Even if she backed out later, at least she would be much more willing to separate, and maybe I could have some fun in the meantime.
"Well then, I'm waiting," I looked down at her doubtfully, daring her to follow through.
She took a moment to catch my meaning before shifting to her knees. After taking a breath to gather her thoughts she spoke.
"I beg you, please let me stay with you. If you do, I'll do anything you want. I'll never refuse you. My body, my mind, my whole life will be your plaything. Just please, please don't leave me."
I was impressed. Her voice had none of the coy seductiveness that says someone is playing at submission. She sounded serious. I still didn't believe her, but I believed that she thought she was serious.
"Fine," I said, keeping a harsh tone of voice, "Understand, this isn't going to be a mild thing. From now on I'll treat you however I want, talk to you however I want, use you however and whenever I want. Your limits are whatever I say they are. Obviously we're mainly thinking about sex here, but this will extend to the rest of your life too. You aren't my submissive girlfriend, you're my bitch and I'm your master. Do you accept?"
"Yes," she said meekly, eyes downcast.
