Crawl

*Note from writer: This first/second person story began as a series of texts over the phone to my partner who was on graveyard shift at work, and bored shitless. Regretfully after the story was finished, it was still a couple of hours before he could return home. Longest two hours of our life!

*

I'm sitting on the laundry steps waiting for you to finish smoking. It is late at night, yet all around me is a crisp twilight, instead of the usual chilly pitch black I was expecting. I notice the moon is full and glowing brightly. It is enough to illuminate your face. I can see you crouching on the concrete strip along the back fence looking at me.

Nervous excitement begins to tingle at my insides as I feel the weight of you watching me. I can tell you are undressing me with your eyes, and planning dirty but delicious things to do to me. It is just that kind of heavy look, filled with hungry intentions and creative plans.

Suddenly I find myself remembering the night before. Watching you draw back from me and standing up. I see again in my mind's eye your nakedness, your cock hanging heavily between your legs, still long but spent for the time being. Again, I feel the same desire to crawl to you to draw your heavy cock back in my mouth to suck on.

I meet your eyes across the yard with a similar look of my own and am met with a grin of knowing. I try to not look guilty and laugh uncomfortably. Busted. There is just no escaping you, not when you know me so well.

You jerk your head indicating I should come over to you, but when I get up, I am met with a shake of your head.

"No."

"W..." I open my mouth to start to ask, and am interrupted.

"Crawl." The look on your face intensifies.

I feel shock. How did you know what was going through my head? It was something I had not spoken out loud to you before. Then I realize you are serious. I feel nervous worry and glance over at the neighbor's yard. Surely not! Our back fence was just a chain link and the guy next door often smoked pot on his back lawn at odd hours.

When I glance back at you again, I know I am a goner and a fleeting cross feeling passes over me. A part of me still doesn't like that I want to subjugate myself like that, not to anyone, not even you. Oh but I do... to you. Oh yes, definitely to you! I crave that intensity and closeness, something I've never had before with anyone.

Without meaning to my eyes lower to the ground as I struggle with myself. I want to do it, I argue soundlessly. But I don't want to be submissive to you. I'm not that person. Damn it!

"No!" I say with a burst of defiance, meeting your eyes with a challenge.

You have been waiting for this, expecting it even. Your gaze is still steady. I know you must be smirking on the inside but there is no sign of it on your expression. I will do what I'm told. You know this, and say it again.

"Crawl."

I can't help it. I want to please you. Your command unbalances me as I am pressed into that emotional area of doubt, instability and awkwardness. Yet it also excites me, a double bind. To escape this discomfort, I protest.

"The grounds

dirty

!" I exclaim. I realize I sound nervous. A slight pause and then a more confident "I'm not doing that!" bursts out of me. I glare at you and cross my arms.

It is then I see your patient smile.

"I know." Again, you jerk your head and your eyes flick to the ground in front of you, then back to me. You wait while I wonder at your comment. It could be a simple response to my protest but somehow it feels like more than that.

I drop my gaze, unable to meet your eyes. I can feel you inside my head, inside me, in places where nobody should ever be. I get on my hands and knees. With my head low, I start crawling towards you. After I've only gone a short way, I steal a peek at you.

"Stop." You command of me. "Take off your clothes." I glance around uncomfortably, but you insist again before I can protest. "Do it." A pause... and then you growl at me.

"Now."

I know I can't stand up. You didn't say I could. I lean back on my heels and pull off my shirt. I try to not blush when I unhook and remove my bra. I feel really awkward. The neighbor better be in bed asleep. I reach behind my back and hesitate at the knot of my wraparound skirt. I have no undies on. I look at you and your eyes drift down my body to my skirt.

It occurs to me to take some power back by teasing. I spread my knees apart and am rewarded with pleasure on your face. I know you like this position. It stirs your emotions so obviously. A slow smile of satisfaction appears on my face. I undo the knot and the skirt falls to the ground as I open it. I rest my hands on my thighs, palms open upwards, and avoid your stare.

The night air feels cool on my bare skin. I am so very naked and exposed in the bright moonlight. I shift uncomfortably, my glee fading. Shivers of embarrassment race up my spine to my neck. I hate feeling like property, at the same time I love it so very much because I like being yours.

Indeed, my little power play made it easy to adopt this position, but it was harder already. Some control may have shifted to me with my choice to play at submission, but in kneeling there the facade became real.

My head hangs for what seems an eternity of feeling you assess me. I can't take it anymore and look up at you for my next instruction.

It comes after a nod of approval.

"Crawl."

Your eyes strip me even more naked than I thought I could possibly feel. I start to move but am stopped with another instruction.

"Wait... Don't look away from me again 'kay? Crawl slowly. I want to see your hips move."

I place my hands on the ground and pause there a moment looking into your eyes trying to resist the urge to lower them. You get impatient and jerk your head again. I move a hand and knee forward slowly. I feel my hips begin their natural sway. Your eyes drift from my face to enjoy watching my ass move. I want to hide. But instead I do as I'm told. I crawl to you.

When I get there, you stroke my hair towards my back, your fingers curling and tightening at the back of my neck momentarily before scraping down my spine. Your hand reaches my butt and squeezes it tight. I'm made to get over your knees and I do so eagerly knowing what is coming.

It doesn't come. Instead of the stinging slap across my ass cheeks, I feel light fingers teasing up the insides of my thighs. You tease me mercilessly, brushing against my cunt lips, wriggling your way just past them to stroke on my clit for a second before withdrawing. I feel nothing for long minutes, and then as my body relaxes, your fingers creep back.

Wetness spreads to my thighs. I am intensely aware of my ass wanting to be spanked. I can actually feel the anticipation in my skin. I start whimpering and struggling but your other hand pushes my back firmly down and the teasing continues.

To my embarrassment I start begging. "Please," I groan, not quite sure what I am asking for. It becomes a kind of litany, saying please over and over again, not even realizing I am begging anymore. The torment continues for what seems like ages and is broken abruptly by a sharp stinging across my butt.

My mind is still trying to register this when the second one falls. The stinging intensifies and I suck in a breath sharply. There is a pause during which all the sensations begin to register and I moan.

More irregular slaps fall as you increase their force to the point where I am breathing faster and wriggling, trying to absorb the pain. The spanking levels off at this intensity and settles into a regular rhythm.

During the pauses between each blow, my frantic mind struggles to take it all in. I think I can't bear it any more. I breathe. Each following sting scatters my thoughts. Your other arm is resting heavy across my upper back, keeping me down. I struggle, but not much. All my energy is going into trying to breathe deeply. The stinging becomes a hot burn and I can't think. I give in to sensation. My whole body falls still. I am dimly aware I am not making noise anymore.

I can feel my heart beating against the outside of your thigh. I can feel the heat of my heavy breathing. I can feel my ass tingling as the pain becomes something else deep inside me. The spanking becomes harder but it is nothing. I can take it. I am not really here. I am somewhere else spaceless, soundless, awash with sensation. It feels nice, but nice isn't the right word.

I drift there until a particularly hard slap shocks me back. I get no respite after that point as both the speed and intensity pick up, bringing me back to the present. I wriggle and try to escape it. I feel half choked sobs on my breath as I try to get my breath back. Finally it stops.

Roughly both of your hands grasp my butt and spread my cheeks open. Another part I both love and hate. I know it is coming, yet I still jump.

Your finger flicks me hard a few times on my anus. It hurts. It surprises. The sensation displaces and I feel it in other areas, not just there. Then your fingers reach down to my cunt lips and grab them hard. You pull me open for full scrutiny.

Cool air washes over me intimately and suddenly I am mortified. My noises of pleasure deepen with a tinge of horrified embarrassment to them. I try to close my legs and move away but am prevented from doing so.

I know you have noticed the change in my noises when I feel myself spread even wider. I feel you bend over me for a closer look. My face heats up as I give up struggling and become passive.

For some reason I start to get aroused right alongside my shame. My legs shift as I try to open them wider for you and my butt pushes out begging you to end the emotional torment. I feel your fingers explore inside of me and I am wriggling again wanting to come.

You start spanking me again altering it with light clit rubbing and rough fingers jabbing inside of me. I start to cum and you hit me harder. The intensity is wonderful, and again, my sounds change, this time to uncontrollable relief and pleasure.

Eventually all the physical feelings subside, leaving me high and spaced out. My body is limp over your lap in contrast to your hardness jutting up at my belly.

Suddenly the emotions hit me hard. I don't know whether to laugh or cry or feel deeply ashamed or pleasured or upset or sated. I can't grab any particular feeling and I don't know how I feel. But you are there, your warm body next to mine and your eyes on me, loving me. I crawl up into your arms and surrender to you completely.