I had been a seasoned traveller for a long old time. Vacationing had always been like my little escape from the drudgery of every day life, you know, like work and having to deal with the daily stresses that every adult has to endure. Bills, taxes, responsibilities that seem to creep up and mount, however much you try to get on top of things. It seemed my entire, adult life had been saturated by constant political crap, as well as the dire state of the economy, which seemed to get worse with each passing year. On top of that, the whole way the world was shifting in recent times, with social media and the like, just didn't sit well with me. I didn't care about doing things for 'likes'. I actually preferred to get out there and experience things for real. Over the past few years, all the stresses of life had come at me in waves, and every day seemed to be a whole new reason to get depressed. Which is why, once each year, I'd take a few weeks off and go somewhere to just chill out. Something away from the bullshit of my mundane, daily life. I'd save up throughout the year just for this one adventure, and it had become a real highlight for me, making the daily grind somewhat bearable.
I'd always go on the trip alone. I mean, I'd had a few girlfriends over the years, but was kind of a lone wolf, and I preferred to arrange my own itinerary without anyone else disrupting my plans. I'd started off travelling a little around Central and South America, particularly the Caribbean Islands, as it was convenient with its close proximity to the States. However, more recently, I'd been opting for Southeast Asian countries. Things were just a hell of a lot cheaper over there, and there was nothing better than chilling on one of their tranquil beaches, hot sand between your toes, the blue sea out ahead with an ice-cool beer in your hand. The locals depended on the tourism for their economy, so they always went above and beyond to treat you well. On top of that, the women were something else, and I found I received the kind of attention from them that I could never hope for back home. Perhaps it was because they were desperate for money and wanted to escape their own, third-world country so much, but whatever it was, I wasn't complaining; I felt like a king whenever I stepped foot into one of their bars. Another positive was the fact that I didn't have to endure the usual bullshit that women seemed to adore throwing at you during a relationship. Once my travel was over, I could leave the women behind and get back to my life without any of the usual hang-ups.
However, in all of my travels around Asia, despite having already visited Malaysia, Singapore, Cambodia, Vietnam and Laos, I'd never actually been to Thailand before. The Land of Smiles had been on my bucket list for a long time and it always felt like it needed a whole vacation to itself. I'd thought about tacking it onto one of the other trips in the past, but that didn't sit well, like I'd be doing it an injustice. This year, after saving every cent I could spare, I'd finally been able to make the trip. I'd planned everything out to a precision level, and made sure that I was going to get a real sense of the country, particularly the attractions on offer, and most notably, the beaches and hot weather.
After a gruelling flight, upon arrival, I was excited to experience the culture and spicy cuisine, but most of all, I was desperate to get a load of the women over there. I'd heard such good things about Thai women over the years, and how much they had a thing for foreigners. Apparently, it didn't matter if you were a bit older, balding and a little overweight, because these women could see past that. They were interested in being taken care of, and in return, they'd take care of you. That was a fair trade as far as I was concerned.
Lugging my trusty rucksack, I stepped out of the airport excited for a month of adventure. After much research, I'd planned the trip out so that I would start off in the south, kicking around between places like Phuket and Krabi. You know the sort, with crystal blue water and white sandy beaches. I spent the first week just chilling on the coast, though occasionally taking a boat trip over to one of the islands. There was a lot to do in terms of snorkelling, banana boats and all that malarkey, as well as enjoying an ice-cold beer while watching those giant lizards walk by with their slithering tongues. I took a canoe trip through the mangroves and fed fruit to the monkeys along the shore cliffs. I tried rum with sugar cane, squeezed right there by hand. I even got a bit toked up, considering cannabis shops were practically everywhere. After a few days of total relaxation, I knew the Thai way of life was definitely for me.
Similarly, my nights were spent partying it up till the break of dawn beneath the moonlight, while slurping cocktails from the infamous fish bowls. As expected, much interest was received from the local Thai women, and I knew I'd made the right choice in my holiday destination. I was even considering the idea of one day retiring to Thailand, since the place just had so much to offer me and all of the expats that were settled there kept talking it up. Though, for the time being, I was just enjoying every second of my vacation and living for the moment.
Gradually, as the days went by, I worked my way up along the coast. The first stop was Koh Samui, which had a similar feel to Phuket, if I was truthful. Therefore, I moved onto Koh Lao, which honestly, was a bit crazy. On the very first night, I'd got a bit too tanked up on Pina Coladas and driven my moped into a ditch. A few bruises later and all was good, but it was a bit of a reality check about how fragile my body actually was. I'd always been a gym rat, and had enjoyed a few successful years as an amateur boxer. I prided myself on my strength and stamina, but at the end of the day, I was just meat and bones. After grazing myself right up, I promised never to fuck around with a Thai motorcycle again, reining my adventurous side in and opting for more relaxed activities from then on.
Up the coast I continued, visiting Hua Hin for a few days, but finding it was pretty much filled with white pensioners that had come over for a bit of pussy. I mean, it was chilled, but I actually felt like kind of a pervert. Heading out to the bars just didn't have the same feel for me when I was surrounded by old, fat, white-haired men. That was the exact reason why I'd decided not to head to Pattaya, as I'd heard it was basically just filled with sex-starved foreigners that couldn't get any women back home. I mean, I was interested in getting laid, but I just felt uneasy while surrounded by a load of guys trying to do the same thing. I preferred to remain off the beaten path where I was considered a gem amongst the coal. Where the women would recognise my value and put effort into wooing me. When there was a load of other foreigners available, the women were less enthused and didn't put in the effort. That's how my experiences had gone in Malaysia and Vietnam, so I'd decided to avoid the main foreigner-laden sexual hubs in Thailand. I mean, there were beautiful women everywhere, even out in the obscure fringe villages, so I knew I was getting my dick sticky whatever happened. Hua Hin turned out to be fruitful in that department, with a couple of massage girls offering some extra services for very reasonable prices. The countless hours overtime I'd worked throughout the year was definitely spent well.
Eventually, I had left the Thai beach cities and headed towards the capital for the finality of my trip. I had always wanted to visit Bangkok, the city known for its bustling street life and delicious food. Despite loving to chill on the beaches, I was actually beyond excited to explore all that Bangkok had to offer for a single guy like myself. I'd heard that the air was filthy as shit, but the street life was something that couldn't be compared to any other city on the planet. This was exactly the kind of thing I was into. Going down narrow alleys and finding hidden gems that no one else knew of, and then keeping it to myself, not taking a million photos and posting all over the internet.
Once I reached Bangkok, after a horrific bus journey where I thought we were going to die a number of times, the Thai roads being infamous for crashes, I disembarked and took a deep breath. Immediately, I felt like I was about to cough and splurge my guts up; the stagnant air confirming my fears of the rampant pollution. The cloudy streets, with the various colours of lights and market sellers, all harassing and trying to peel my money from me, felt like something out of a dystopian movie. Still, I was only planning to stay a couple of days, so it wasn't like I was going to choke to death or anything.
I quickly learned that the pace was so different in comparison to the coastal cities. There was hardly any of the relaxation, and I was constantly on a taxi bike or cramped on the public trains. The city itself was huge, with all of the things I had planned to see spaced out. I started my first day by visiting the famous Wat Phra Kaew temple. Despite thinking of myself as a bit of an alpha kind of guy, into the beers and women, I was in awe of the intricate details of the temple and the serene atmosphere within its walls. I gifted a few baht to a monk, who in turn blessed me, and after paying my respects, I ventured out into the bustling streets, sampling some of the cheap market food.
Next, I took a scenic boat tour of the city, gliding down the Chao Phraya River and taking in the magnificent views of the city's skyline. As the sun began to set, I made my way to the famous Khao San Road to experience the vibrant nightlife. The street was teeming with street vendors selling all sorts of delicious food and drinks, and the energy was electric, just having this young and free feel to it. I even tried a Thai rice whiskey, which had been made by the very guy selling it on the street. It burned like fuck on the way down my throat, but I was buzzing for the rest of the night.
Finally, I ended my trip with a visit to the Grand Palace and Wat Arun, two stunning temples that left me in awe, and for once, I felt like I'd really appreciated the culture of a place, rather than just getting wasted and spending most of my time at bars. By that point, I was done, feeling like I'd pretty much done everything I set out to do. I took a final tuk-tuk ride through the city on the way back to my hotel, experiencing the chaotic yet thrilling streets of Bangkok one more time, taking in the bright lights of the city while dreading my return to work.
I was just about to reach the final block before my hotel, when I noticed a ruckus going on in the streets; a collective crowd gathered up outside some kind of arena. I tapped the driver on the shoulder and asked him to slow down, before fishing a couple of notes out, which he greedily accepted.
There were a few other foreign tourists, bustling up amongst the locals, and it looked like they were lining up at some kind of ticket booth. Already I was starting to feel the excitement of experiencing something new. Something impromptu and unplanned which I hadn't been expecting. That was part of the fun of exploring a foreign city, where you'd often find hidden wonders buried away in the places you least expected. The fact I'd thought my trip was over and that I was about to head to sleep for the final time only made the discovery all the better. My flight wasn't until mid-afternoon the next day, so I had a few hours to sneak in a final bit of fun.
"Hey buddy," I asked one of the foreigners, who was taking a swig from a local beer. He was wearing a pair of those baggy, loose-fitting pants with the elephants on, the kind that most of the tourists donned to save their ankles from the mosquitos and because they thought it made them look cool. The kind of trinket I'd never be caught dead in because I wasn't that sort of idiot. "What's going on here then?"
"It's the boxing," he said. "There's a couple of fights going on tonight, bud. Can see the whole lot for a couple of hundred baht."
