07

CHAPTER FIVE

Fairy Tales are Overrated

Ethan released my wrists while he was still fully seated inside me. I hadn't realized how much I wanted to touch him until that moment. Then my fingers were weaving into his hair and running over his back as if my life depended on it.

He started to rock his hips to move inside me and I hissed.

"Sore?"

I nodded. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay, baby." Ethan eased out of me and shifted his hip onto the mattress, flush against my side. He swung his leg over my hip and tucked me into his chest, enveloping me with his arms. "This is just as good."

"Liar."

Ethan chuckled and kissed the top of my head. "Okay, you're right. But I'd rather you enjoy it with me than be wincing in pain."

"That doesn't sound very Dom-like?"

"Why not?"

"Aren't you supposed to like inflicting pain?"

Ethan laughed and squeezed me almost painfully. "I do. Sometimes. Not like that, though."

I wanted to ask him more about it but I chickened out. I wasn't sure I was ready to talk about that just yet. I was really starting to like him and I was afraid he'd say something that might scare me. I knew he sensed it, too. I got the feeling he was taking things a lot slower than he usually did.

"What did you think of your first clitoral?"

"I thought you'd broken me down there." Ethan chuckled and kissed my temple. "No, seriously, you were amazing."

"You were the one who did it, not me."

"What do you mean?"

"I just helped you to get where you wanted to go."

"I've never done that before in my life, Ethan. I swear."

"Shhhh, don't get upset. I understand. All I'm saying is that you deserve most of the credit. Why is that so hard for you to accept?"

"I don't know, because it doesn't feel that way to me. You were the one who ordered me to come."

"Yeah, but that was just timing. You were about to go on your own."

"It was your voice that tipped me over the edge."

Ethan nuzzled my hair as he spoke. "Mmmm, I'd love for that to be the case someday."

"That's how it is in all my fantasies about you."

"It is?"

"Yeah."

"Damn, Grace. You're making me hard just talking about it." Ethan ground his pelvis into my backside to prove his point. It sent a tiny shockwave of arousal through my body.

I tried to turn my focus on less stimulating topics. "I had some questions that popped into my head earlier but I can't remember now what they were."

Ethan stilled his hips and readjusted me in his arms to better converse. "Something about what we were doing?"

"No, more like about Domination/submission in general. How that works."

"What we just did, what I plan to do this weekend with you, is simply called 'topping'."

"How is that different than dominating?"

"Well, it's not when you put it like that. But when you refer to D/s or M/s, you're really describing a relational pairing. A type of relationship."

"What are you saying? That we're not...?"

"No, stop that. Of course we're in a relationship. It's just not a D/s one. Yet, anyway. That sort of interaction takes time. And I'm not sure that's something you want."

"I'm not sure I know what it is."

"Exactly."

"Is it like having written agreements in place, and rules, and things like that?"

"It can be. It doesn't have to be that formal. Most D/s couples I hang around just know what their boundaries are without having to put them on paper."

"How is that different from any other type of relationship, then?"

"Sometimes it's not, I guess. Every D/s coupling is different. The common thread through all of them is that in one or more aspect of their interaction is the understanding that one party is Dominant while the other is submissive. That may just be prevalent in the bedroom, or it may encompass all aspects of their life, including the household and even work."

"I thought it meant that the submissive always has to do what the Dominant wants."

Ethan chuckled, "I wish." I twisted my neck to scowl at him. "I'm just kidding, stop your frowning. Actually, that wouldn't interest me in the least."

"Then what

does

interest you?"

Ethan took a few moments to think. "I have to be in control in the bedroom. I don't think I can even function any other way." He paused a few seconds before continuing. "I feel more comfortable when I'm the one driving our activity as a couple. But that doesn't mean that we only hang out with my friends, or do what I want.

"I like to push my partner past boundaries, if you haven't figured that out already. Occasionally, that will involve some physical discomfort."

"Pain?"

"Yes."

I held my breath, afraid he was going to continue.

"Does that bother you?"

"A little."

"Then we won't talk about it."

"But what if that's a deal-breaker for us?" It was the single irksome thought that had been creeping around the back of my mind since we first started seeing each other.

"It won't be. Anyway, talking about it isn't going to solve anything. I can't possibly describe to you the experience because it's dependent on the situation and your state of mind at the time. I will say this, though. I won't do anything you don't want me to do."

"So, you won't whip me?"

"I didn't say that."

"But you just said..."

"I said that I wouldn't do anything you didn't want me to do. When the time comes, you'll want it. Mark my words, Grace. Just as sure as I'm lying here with you, there will come a time when you'll beg me for it. And if I'm very lucky, you'll do it out loud and not in that busy head of yours."

"I don't think I'm wired the right way for that. What if I never get to that point?"

"You don't have to be an all-out masochist to want to be whipped. Not all sessions are punishing. I know a lot of women who orgasm from being sensually flogged. I think you'd really get off on that."

"You do?"

"Oh, yeah."

"Now you have me curious."

"And so it begins."

I growled at him and pretended to try to free myself. He just chuckled and tightened his grasp until I stopped moving. We stayed in that position sharing a comfortable silence for several minutes. Then another nagging question prompted me to speak. "Was that okay for you?"

"Yes. Of course it was. Why do you ask?"

"Well, because, you know, I couldn't keep going and everything."

"Oh, baby, that's fine. I told you not to expect it to be perfect the first time. We're just getting started."

"I know, but I don't want to disappoint you."

"Oh, God Grace, is that what you think?"

I shrugged.

"You are far from a disappointment, baby."

Ethan's whole demeanor seemed to change and I felt so guilty that I'd tainted our post-coital cuddle with my own insecurities. I was carrying some baggage. I knew it. But that didn't change anything. I couldn't help feeling the way I did.

We both sort of fell into a pensive state. Each in our own thoughts. This time it was Ethan who broke the silence. "Grace, baby?"

"Yes?"

"I want you to go to the bathroom and run a hot bath. I think it will help with the soreness."

"Okay."

"There's a washcloth next to the sink."

"Are you coming with me?"

"I'll be there in a few minutes."

"What about these?" I held out my wrists.

Ethan unbuckled the straps of each cuff and set them aside. My heart sank when he did it. "This is temporary. I'll put them back on after your bath."

"Are you going to tie me up again?"

"Probably not tonight. But I want you to wear them, anyway. As a reminder."

Ethan tilted my head and kissed me deeply, plunging his tongue into my mouth without hesitation. His hand slid up my stomach to cup my breast as he did so and I gasped in his mouth.

"Now, go."

His kiss sent my senses reeling. It took me a moment to get my balance when I stood.

I padded to the master bathroom and headed straight for the tub, stopping the drain and turning on the water. It was only then that I realized I was completely naked. I'd been so stunned by his kiss it hadn't dawned on me. I walked to the door and peered out to the bed. Ethan wasn't there. I started to close the door and stopped myself. It seemed like such a prudish thing to do. He told me he was going to join me in a few minutes.

It's not like he hasn't seen you naked, Grace. You were tied to his bed, for God's sake.

A heated flush crawled up my neck and face as I tried to process the reality of my previous situation. I was so excited when he was doing it that it never dawned on me to be embarrassed.

My hot cheeks are proof enough of my embarrassment now.

I glanced around the bathroom for a mirror. There was none.

Oh, surely there's one here somewhere.

I swung the door halfway closed and checked behind it.

Nothing. Isn't that the strangest thing?

The bathtub was filling quickly. I felt the temperature and decided it would do. I shut off the faucets and snatched the washcloth from the countertop before stepping into the tub and lowering myself into the water. I was definitely sore. I immediately soaked the washcloth and went to work gently cleansing the sensitive tissue. I wanted to do it before he showed up. There were some indelicacies I wasn't ready to share, yet.

I still wasn't sure how this was all going to work out with us. Everything I'd read, the interviews and research I'd done, seemed to describe more extreme D/s agreements. I couldn't quite picture Ethan trying to control everything I did. On the other hand, I looked to him for direction. And not just in bed. On our dates. In our conversations. We talked about my work and I asked for his opinion on things.

Is that the same as a D/s relationship?

Somehow I didn't think it qualified.

It felt natural to just let him lead, though. And I wasn't giving up anything. At least it didn't feel that way. I tried to recall if I felt anything different when I was tied up. When he was clearly topping me. Other than being immensely aroused, I couldn't recall anything. It was amusing to me that at no time did I even view what we were doing as different.

But it was different.

What we did wasn't anything like the sex I'd had with Robert. It was better.

Way better.

I thought about the stories I'd written. Some of them, not all of them, had BDSM elements in them. But writing about nipple clamps, butt plugs, spankings, and bondage wasn't the same as capturing the essence of the lifestyle. I still had so much more to learn. And I knew that the only way to do that was to live it.

"Hey, baby. How's your bath?"

I glanced up when he entered, surprised that he was wearing a pair of shorts. His hair was wet. "Good. Are you going to join me?"

"No, I took a quick shower. I brought you a bottle of water."

I tried to hide my disappointment, but I must not have done a very good job. I've never been known for my poker face.

"Grace, I'm trying to give you the space you need to process all this. I don't want to overwhelm you. I'm not pushing you away. Just the opposite. I'm afraid if I press you too hard, you'll run. You understand what I'm saying, baby?"

I nodded, "I think so."

Ethan kneeled beside the tub with a concerned expression. "I need you to trust that I'm not going to leave you."

Tears stung the corners of my eyes. He'd hit the nail on the head. I was already looking for signs that he wanted out without even realizing it. "I'm sorry. It's hard for me."

I was barely managing to hold back the flood.

"I know it is. After our talks, I was expecting this. It's okay. I'm not going anywhere."

Once again, I felt like such a basket case.

How many more of these little episodes am I going to have? How many more will he tolerate before he changes his mind?

Ethan picked up the folded towel that was sitting next to the sink and opened it up. "Come on. You've had enough time to soak."

I nodded and lifted the plug to let the water drain before standing up. I stepped out of the tub and into the towel he held open for me and then let him dry me off.

All of a sudden I felt very drained. I couldn't keep my eyes open as he swiped the towel over every inch of my damp body. In such a short span of time I'd cycled through so many emotions it just wiped me out.

Ethan tossed the towel over the side of the tub and then led me back to his bedroom. I lifted my chin and smiled enthusiastically in an effort to appear perkier than I was. I suspected that Ethan was younger than me, and I guessed that the girls he played with were young and eager, too.

They probably go all night without tiring.

It was a damned annoying thought that made me feel inadequate in whole new ways.

Ethan sat me on the bed and fastened the cuffs around my wrists. "What side of the bed do you usually sleep on?"

"I've moved to the middle, I'm afraid. No sense in staying on one side when there's no one on the other half."

Ethan chuckled. "I couldn't agree more. We'll just have to share the middle."

When he'd finished buckling the cuffs he patted the pillow indicating I should lay down.

"I need to turn off some lights and check the front door. I'll be back in a second."

I listened while he did exactly what he said he was going to do. I secretly wondered if he realized how important it was to me that he did that. I wondered if all jilted women had the same need.

Ethan returned a moment later. He shucked his shorts and crawled under the covers, immediately sliding to the center of the mattress and tugging me toward him. We shifted and adjusted, finally settling into a comfortable spooning position.

His voice was a soft whisper at my ear. "Are you comfortable?" I nodded. "No unwanted memories for you?"

It took me a second to realize what he was asking. Robert was the furthest person from my mind. "No, not at all. Robert didn't spoon."

"How could he resist, with this body?" His question was obviously rhetorical. After a few seconds of silence I heard him mumble. "Some guys are clueless."

I don't remember anything after that.

***

A cramp in my left calf woke me up. I flexed my foot to make it go away, then I became aware of the weight holding me face down on the mattress.

Ethan was draped mostly over me, with his head resting between my shoulder blades.

No need for restraints. I couldn't possibly escape this.

I felt a hot, wet tickle down my spine and quickly realized that he was drooling. The first thought that came to my mind was how cute I thought it was, followed by the realization that if it were me doing the drooling, I'd be mortified.

I lay still, allowing the fog to lift slowly. The ambient light told me it was morning, but I had no clue as to the time. And for once, I didn't care. I had no other commitments. And I was content.

After several minutes of unfocused thinking I began to stir ever so slightly. My muscles and joints were nearly numb from being trapped in one position. As they reawakened, I became aware of the rocklike object pressing against the back of my thigh. I wasn't positive it was an erection, at least until a moment later when Ethan stirred and removed all doubt. He was unbelievably hard.

Ethan groaned and pressed his hips against my backside. His need was evident and it ratcheted up my own desire a notch. I wondered if I was ever going to get used to this beautiful man wanting me.

"Reach up and grip the headboard for me."

His gruff command send a wave of fresh arousal through me the likes I would never have imagined. I quickly obeyed.

"Don't let go."

I gasped as I felt the hot gush deep within me. His instructions were arousing me beyond reason.

Ethan's hands moved over my body freely, caressing my skin, squeezing my buttocks and reaching beneath me to grope my breasts. After a few moments of exploring, he focused his energy on kneading my buttocks. He lifted his hand and delivered a quick slap across one butt cheek.

I yelped and tightly gripped the bars of the headboard. He repeated it again, obtaining a sharp clapping noise with the blow. The sound was more alarming than the feel of it.

I'd been spanked before. It was in my college years. My first taste of kink. It wasn't what I had expected at the time. I'd had numerous fantasies about being spanked and it just didn't come close to that. I just figured I wasn't cut out for it like some girls.

But this,

this

was something different. Maybe because Ethan already turned me on so much. Or maybe because I was holding onto the headboard like he'd ordered me to do ... I don't know. But there was definitely something other than my butt cheeks heating up.

I arched my back to more fully present my backside to him. Ethan's hand stilled and then reached between my thighs to finger the wetness that was beginning to pool there.

"Damn I want to lick your pussy. But not unless you're going to come while I'm doing it. We're going to work on that today, baby. Are you too sore for me to fuck you?"

I gasped and shook my head. "No. Please..." I couldn't think of anything I wanted more.

His palm continued to come down hard on my buttocks, one blow after another. "I want your ass good and pink when I do."

Each slap was beginning to reverberate through my sensitive, swollen pussy. I thought it might drive me mad. "Please fuck me, Ethan. I can't stand it."

Ethan growled and yanked apart my thighs. A second later I felt the head of his cock easing into my opening. There was a pinch of pain but it quickly dissipated as he slid farther inside me.

"God your cunt feels good, baby."

I'd never imagined that such a confession would excite me, but my own pussy betrayed me with a spontaneous contraction. There was something indescribably sexy about the way it sounded.

"I want to feel you come around my cock."

I shook my head. "Don't wait for me."

There was a sharp sting on my hip, accompanied by a loud clap. He'd slapped it hard.

"Ow..."

I waited for an explanation for the punishing blow, but he offered none. He merely started rocking his hips.

He lifted one of my thighs higher on the mattress to gain a better angle for a deeper thrust and then began to pump in earnest. He released tiny grunts each time his dick slammed into me and the sound of his raw voice unraveled me unexpectedly.

"Oh, E ... E ..." I couldn't get out his full name between thrusts as he pounded me even more furiously as I came. And then a few short moments later, he joined me.

"Fuck." Ethan's muscles locked in place, his pelvis fully thrusted against me as he unloaded. "Fuck, baby. Fuck."

I couldn't understand why he was still cussing. He was clearly finished ejaculating. I lifted my head and turned my face to the side with a questioning expression.

"You're milking my cock dry."

I frowned, still not sure if that was a bad thing or a good thing.

"It's unreal. Fucking amazing." Ethan collapsed onto my back, heaving and sputtering in a weak cough.

It was far from the romantic interlude I'd been taught I should demand from sex.

It was better ... I came. With him inside.

It wasn't the first time it had happened, but it was the quickest I'd ever come.

And it dawned on me just how overrated fairy tales really were.

CHAPTER SIX

Playtime

Any tension I might have felt as a result of really not having a single clue what to expect next was gone; or at least had been dissipated by our morning session.

Ethan went to the kitchen to make coffee while I got cleaned up and dressed. I sort of expected him to tell me what to wear and everything, but he didn't. So, I pulled on my shorts and oversized tee and walked into the kitchen. His smile as I approached told me I'd chosen the right clothes. They were the same ones I'd be wearing if I were at home without him. Comfortable.

His arm outstretched when I was a few feet away from him and I stepped into his embrace. It was all so natural.