Dinner was as expected, with the four of us sitting around the dining room table as Kelly, and her younger daughter, Anne peeked their heads in to see what we thought of it before they moved on to cleaning up and putting the finishing touches on the cake respectively.
Mom and Dad were still glaring daggers at each other while picking at their food. Constance and I, now long used to the two bickering, continued on to eating the ridiculous spread Kelly and Anne had made, including a rack of lamb and a candle salad with melon balls at the base that was probably Anne's idea because even Kelly thinks some things are sacred.
The conversation was mostly light, stilted and uneventful as we all tried to avoid the subject of the exceptionally phallic candle salad.
Dad was the first one to broach the other sensitive subject of the day. "So, um, son, did you do her yet?"
I was too embarrassed to say anything as my mother looked at my father in shock.
Constance laughed. "No, Steven's been too busy talking to her and calming her down." She said, "Besides, he probably doesn't know where to start, after all, Anne and Grace are the only girls in the house, and he's probably still pining after Ellen Borchert."
"Can we go without talking about Ellen Borchert? That was three years ago!" I said, "Besides, Marie is a mess right now, and needs to get settled in first, which includes me getting the taxes and registration all sorted out."
"That's a nice name." My mother said, gesturing with her wine glass, "See Bruce, I told you he was responsible enough to have a car."
"Not for the Buick." My father said, "Besides, I already did all the tax stuff at the broker's. The original title is in the safe as are all the tax records. She's only on there under her registration number though."
"Thanks," I said. "That does help a lot. So now I just have to go shopping tomorrow, but Constance already volunteered to help there."
At about this point, the cherry fell off the banana on the candle salad, and Constance finished the job of emasculating it while I finished off a serving of plantains, and poached the pineapple ring before my father could steal it.
Soon enough, the rack of lamb was just a pile of bones, and Grace and Kelly cleared the table as we moved to the front room in preparation for dessert.
Jimmy and Grace had by this time dragged a very confused Marie into the front room as they were trying to explain things to her.
Shortly there after, Anne carried the cake in, giving off a look that simply exuded 'sorry, not sorry' the entire time, while Kelly and my mother just gave her dirty looks.
The cake wasn't anything spectacular, looking just like a small, if rather elaborately decorated, chocolate cake with a couple lit candles in it.
My family, free and slave, sang "Happy Birthday," with the only exception being a now very lost Marie who simply stood there in a party hat that someone had put on her.
Trying to include the poor girl, I had her sit on the floor next to me as we all ate our slices of the extremely rich chocolate cake. Anne had of course, outdone herself as usual. Sadly, this meant I missed out on Marie's faces as she had any kind of sweets for the first time in her life, and seemed to regard the sliver of cake she had been given with a combination of deep suspicion and reverence before she quickly devoured it.
Finally, with the cake done, there was the whole gift thing, as Anne quickly gathered the plates and hauled off the remains of the cake.
The gifts weren't going to be anything big, just cards from family on the other coast and things like that, as I'd go out with my friends over the weekend.
I proceeded to open the envelopes in rough arrangement of size, passing the cards or boxes off to a rather giddy Marie to hold, before saying thank you if the people who had given me the gift were present.
Dad had, in addition to Marie, given me a few hundred dollars to get her a wardrobe and a bed, which was definitely welcome.
My mother shot my father an indescribably nasty look as I opened her card. She had apparently expected that my father would agree, and I would get her Buick until the very last minute, and had given me a gas card that I'd probably trade to Constance later.
Kelly, Grace and Anne had pooled their gifts to get me a hardback copy of The Joy of Sex, which had more than a few bookmarks already in it, and was probably intended more as a gag gift, but definitely I'd end up using it now.
Constance, and her boy Jimmy had given me a decently sized box, which I had been told to open in private. Kelly's daughters were trying hard to hold in their laughter as they likely speculated what it was. Not wanting to risk the embarrassment of opening such a gift in front of my parents, and more importantly Kelly, I promptly passed it off to Marie before beginning the round of hugs and thank yous.
After that, now that dinner was done for everyone, Kelly and her daughters excused themselves to go finish cleaning up, as everyone else went their separate ways, withdrawing to their own spaces or those of their master, in the case of Jimmy and Marie.
After Marie deposited my gifts on my desk and I had checked that the door to my bedroom was closed and locked, and I was seated on my bed I gestured for her to sit down on a cushion on my floor as I spoke to her.
"Marie," I said, "I just wanted to tell you that I see where you're kind of lost, and will probably have trouble adjusting to some of our quirks immediately, but I've seen how you've handled yourself today, and I'm very proud to say that I think you can definitely do it."
"Yes master," she said, with a look of joy in her eyes, "thank you master."
"Now then Marie, could you hand me the box?" I said, praying that no-one else would be coming soon.
She nodded, stood up, and retrieved it without a word before handing it to me and returning to her seated position.
I held my breath as I opened the box.
Apparently, either my father had told my sister what he was planning, or she had figured I'd do something with either Grace or Anne, since it was pretty much filled to the brim with sex toys and condoms.
Marie thankfully didn't know what they were, and just looked at me with an innocent expression.
There was a book on the contents of the box wedged against one side of it. I removed that, a pair of cuffs and a few condoms, before closing the box again and sliding it under my bed.
