A Soldier's Surrender

I reenlisted in the Army in 2006 after returning from my second deployment to Iraq. At 22 I was a young but battle-hardened soldier who had earned a Silver Star, two Purple Hearts, and a rapid promotion to Staff Sergeant in just four years of military service. It was already a certainty that I was going to be a lifer, a career Army man. I was very grateful to be stationed near Seattle as this would give me the opportunity to continue my education so that I could apply for Officer's Training School in a few years. I was proud to be on a fast track to success.

But there was one area that was not going well, my sex life. I was not a virgin but I had found little satisfaction in the few encounters I had had. I felt like I could not connect in a fulfilling way with females my age. I had had girls fawning over me the few times I had gone out on the town. They did seem to find me desirable as I am good looking with a strong muscular build, but I felt little interest in them. On the other hand, I was strongly attracted to older women. I liked their experience, their confidence, and their beauty but I was always overcome with a paralyzing shyness that kept me from getting anywhere with them. The more I tried to summon up the courage to approach them, the more nervous and socially inept I became. I yearned to connect but it seemed like an impossible dream for me to capture.

One night after placing an ad on Craigslist for a set of tires I wanted to sell, I decided to take a look at the personals. I had checked them out a few times before without ever replying, but I had hope that maybe someday I would find an ad that might lead to something. This posting, halfway down the first page, caught my eye:

"Single white female, mid 40's, seeking a professional younger male (military encouraged to apply) who has a breast fetish and is willing to follow directives. Send me a detailed reply telling me why you are interested. Short answers will be ignored."

At first read I thought the author was rather arrogant for demanding a lengthy reply to a short ad. But a few things caused me to reread it several more times. There was the obvious appeal of an ad with sexual overtones placed by an older woman seeking a younger military guy; but what struck a nerve with me was the phrasing "who has a breast fetish and is willing to follow directives". What exactly did this mean? What was she driving at? What did she hope to get out of this? I couldn't stop thinking about it. I decided to answer the ad. I sent this carefully crafted response:

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Hello!

My name is Michael. I am responding to your ad which you placed on Craigslist on October 15. I have never before answered a personal ad but yours is so intriguing that I decided to drop you a line to let you know that I am interested. I am 22, which I hope is not too young for you. I have been in the Army for four years and I consider myself to be very professional. I have done two tours in Iraq and have been decorated for combat bravery. I am now living on post near the Tacoma area.

I am going to be honest with you. I am attracted to older women but I am also very shy with them. I don't know why but I get nervous when I talk to women who are older. Maybe by telling you this upfront, it will help me get past the jitters. I hope so!

I do have a breast fetish, at least I think so if I understand the term correctly. I am very turned on by large shapely breasts, especially on mature women. Being in the Army, I am highly disciplined and willing to follow directives ... lol. I am not sure what this means for you but I am interested in finding out. I do hope that you will write back to me as I would like to communicate more with you.

Michael

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After writing the letter I read it over many times before pressing the send button. I sat waiting for a reply, but I soon felt silly for expecting her to answer right away as if she were sitting there anticipating my writing to her. The next day I kept checking my inbox but nothing came. After a few days, I gave up hope.

Ten days later I received this:

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Michael;

You have my attention. I need to know that you are willing to follow my commands. If not, do not waste my time.

Crystal

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I was excited about getting a reply but scared by the tone she was using. It was perplexing to me. There was a thrilling aspect that was propelling me to continue while at the same time a little voice in my head was telling me to get away from this. I debated the pros and cons repeatedly before sending this email:

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Crystal;

I am willing to follow your commands.

Michael

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Five days later I got an answer. Again, it was brief and to the point. She wanted my phone number and a time to call. I hesitated, but as before a deepening curiosity edged me forward. I wrote back saying 8 pm on Tuesday would be a good time to call me. There was no reply.

At 8 o'clock Tuesday night I was sitting on my bed hoping she would call. I was tense. I wanted her to call, there was no doubt about that. Something was happening here but I couldn't figure out what it was. It was like I was being pulled in with no choice but to go along. At 8:20 the phone rang.

"Michael, this is Crystal."

"Well, hello! I was wondering if you were gonna ..."

"Yes, I'm sure you were. Listen, I don't have time for small talk. Are you available to meet Saturday night?"

"Where?"

"It doesn't matter where. Are you available?"

"Yes, I am."

"Good. You are to meet me in the lounge to the right of the restaurant inside the Hilton Hotel at exactly 8 pm. I will be sitting at a table near the window. You are to wear your military dress uniform. Look your best."

"Ok."

"You have my interest, Michael. You are to do what I tell you to do. If you do, I will indulge you in a way that I think you will find most satisfying. But if you foul up, if you don't listen to me, if you don't follow my commands, I will immediately walk away and you will be left with nothing but thoughts about what might have been. Do you understand?"

"I think so, but what is ..."

"Michael! Do you understand?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

The connection went dead. I noticed my hand was shaking as I put down my phone.

II

I drove into the parking lot of the hotel at 7:30. I wanted to get there early enough so that I could be sure to meet Crystal at precisely 8 o'clock. There had not been a single waking moment since Tuesday night that I had not been thinking about what might happen with this mysterious woman. It was all so compelling.

At 7:55 I left my car to walk through the front door of the hotel. I went into the restaurant and took a right into the bar. In the back next to the window was a woman sitting alone. I had no doubt it was Crystal. I tried to display a confident look as I walked over to her table but I felt fear inside.

"Crystal?"

"Sit down, Michael."

I was immediately under her spell. Her tone was commanding like she knew it would be met with my instant obedience. When I sat across from her, she looked me in the eye with a powerful visage that disarmed me completely. My eyes stayed connected with hers but I took in the rest of her peripherally. She was stunningly beautiful. Her long silken hair was black with a few strands of grey highlights. Her look was sexy, confident and sophisticated without being overstated. And although I dared not look directly down, I was fully attuned to the magnificence of her breasts. They were large, encased in a tight thin red top that emphasized their firm curves.

"Very good, Michael. I am impressed. You've earned the right to sit there. You have been truthful with me. I require that. You clearly have spent some time getting your uniform and your military affect just perfect. You are a very masculine young professional filled with raging hormones. And I can tell from your demeanor that you'll do what I tell you. I like that."

"Well, I'm really glad to hear that Crystal, but I ... well, I just don't know what I'm getting into here and ..."

"It's really very simple, Michael. In just a few minutes, we're gonna go upstairs and I'm gonna fuck your brains out in ways that you've never even fantasized about. You're a boy wanting to become a man with a woman but you haven't gotten there yet. You need a little help. I'm going to give it to you. In return you will give me everything I demand. It's not complicated, really. We will both get what we need."

I was stunned into silence, submerged in a paralyzing wave of fear.

Just then the waiter came to the table. "May I get you something, sir?"

I was fumbling in my brain for the necessary words to order a beer but Crystal overcame my speech deficiency for me: "He'll have bourbon on the rocks, JB Brown, please. And bring me another glass of wine."

"Yes, Ma'am, I'll have them right over to you."

Crystal lit a cigarette, taking a deep inhale as she continued looking at me. I must have had a bit of a surprised expression.

"Don't worry, no one will say a word about my smoking. This twit of a waiter spends half his time sneaking glances at my tits every time he comes over. He won't dare say anything to me."

I watched as she blew a thin funnel of smoke toward me. I wet my lips, a subconscious action that Crystal acknowledged with a subtle smile.

"So Michael, tell me what you did to earn this Silver Star."

As I started to talk the waiter brought our drinks. The bourbon was strong but I tried to make it appear that I was used to drinking liquor even though beer was all I had ever drunk. I felt a mellowing effect soon enough which I was grateful for as it loosened me up, helping me to talk to Crystal. I gave her a history of my time in Iraq. She listened intently, studying me, never once turning her eyes from mine. I was about to add more when she stopped me with a wave of her hand.

"Let's go up to my room, Michael. It's time."

III

Her "room" was the penthouse suite on the 40th floor. I had never been in such a luxurious setting. I felt like a peasant in a palace, awestruck by my surroundings and the Empress leading me. I commented on the beautiful view of the city from the window but she would have none of it.

"Come over here and stand in front of me."

I did as I was told. My journey was beginning.

"Strip to the waist. Show me your body like you ache to have me see it."

I did ache. And I knew then that she was propagating this ache to expose the strength and depth of my desires. I had to give all to her; I could not hold anything back. She had me. I would do absolutely anything to please her. I removed shirt and tie in a slow and deliberate manner with this ravishing seductress watching every movement. After throwing my tee shirt aside I stood there half naked before her.

"What happened here?" She traced her fingers across the still inflamed red scar near my right shoulder.

"That's where the bullet hit me."

"Where did it go?"

"It went through, coming out my back."

Crystal stepped behind me to examine the larger scar on my back. "Hmmm ... you are quite brave, Michael. Now get your shoes off." In short order, I did.

She then dragged her fingernails from my shoulders down my chest. My breathing quickened as her bright red nails descended past my abdomen. She bent slightly to unfasten my belt and slowly pull down the zipper. I trembled for an instant as she slid my pants down to my ankles.

"What is this?" she asked as she inspected the scarred burn marks on my inner thigh.

"I was struck with a piece of hot shrapnel from an IED."

"Well ... good thing it didn't cut you a few inches higher. Take your pants off all the way and remove your socks." I immediately did so. Crystal sat down on the edge of a coffee table a few feet in front of the couch. She motioned me over.

"Let's see what you got, baby." She pulled my underwear down, revealing my full erection. Although I had always felt confident of my size (which I had once measured at slightly over eight inches) I needed reassurance from my newfound Mistress.

"Ahh ... very nice, Michael. You have ample equipment; problem is you don't know how to use it yet." She then rubbed her soft fingertips around the sensitive rim of my cock in a slow circular motion. I moaned, letting out a loud breath as my knees buckled slightly and my cock twitched away from her fingers.

"You better get it together, little boy! If you come without my permission, you'll be putting your clothes back on and leaving immediately in disgrace. I control your orgasms. It's the only way you're going to learn. Do you understand?"

I was again trapped in silence by the terror that hit when she talked to me in such a way. I had never been addressed in such a demanding tone. But it was mild compared to what was coming. Crystal stood up and stared at me with a fierce piercing look that bore into my soul. Her voice was louder with an emphatic angry tinge: "Do you understand me, motherfucker?"

I responded in a tremulous whisper: "Yes, Ma'am, I do."

"Good."

Her eyes were still locked on mine but the commanding glare softened. As it did my fear diminished. I also realized in that instant that the urges I had been feeling, which were indeed driving me toward a quick orgasm, were now in check. She had established absolute total power over me, body and soul. My orgasms were hers to command.

"Sit down."

I sat in the center of the brown leather sofa. Crystal slipped out of her heels and put one foot between my legs on the edge of the couch. I watched as she reached below her skirt to roll down the black silk stocking on her left leg. She then repeated the process for her right leg. Lastly, she raised her black skirt high to remove the skimpy red panties she was wearing. As she did I caught a slight scent of her pussy, an ambrosial perfume that aroused me tremendously. I wanted to reach out, to touch her, but I didn't dare.

As I sat there watching in amazement, she straddled me with her knees on the couch, facing in. I could feel the heat and moisture of her pussy lips against my cock. Her large breasts, still restrained in the tight red top were touching my naked chest as she inhaled, tempting me. Placing her hands on the back of my neck and shoulders she moved her face in close. Her dominant eyes were locked onto mine.

"You know, Michael, you've spent your whole life seeking approval from authority figures. Mostly you have succeeded, especially with the men who've had power over you: your father, your teachers, or some big wheel officer sending you into battle. But you've never felt that secure feeling of acceptance from the women in your life, have you? You fear their rejection and rather than risk it, you run away like a scared little boy. Isn't that right?"

"Yes, Ma'am." It was the only answer I could give.

Crystal snickered at me. "Are you afraid of me?"

"Yes, Ma'am, I am." Although she had never told me to address her as Ma'am, I now did without thinking about it.

"Very good, Michael. You don't realize it yet but you're getting exactly what you need right now. You want to surrender, you need to surrender. You just need to be in a position where you have no choice. Well, you're there; there's no running away now."

"No, Ma'am."

"And one more thing before we get in deeper. It's going to be at least three hours before you are allowed to have an orgasm. Boys are selfish, always in such a hurry. Tonight you are going to learn to give before you get. You will please before being pleased."

There was no way I could disagree with this fascinating temptress. She seemed to know me better than I knew myself in many ways.

"So tell me, Michael, what do you think of my tits?"

"They're beautiful, Ma'am."

"Ahh yes, but they are much more than that, they are powerful. Very powerful, and I know it well. When I flaunt my tits, grown men turn into puppies. Do you know I once made an attorney who makes over a million a year crawl across the floor to eat canned dog food out of a bowl I had put down for him? The little piglet did it just so he could have the opportunity to worship my tits. And you're cut from the same cloth. It's the main reason you answered my ad, Michael. You crave to submit to a woman's breasts. Yes, you see, I understand your needs. You'll do anything, won't you?"

"Yes."

"Would you like to touch them?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

"You have my permission."

I raised my hands to her breasts. They were heavy but very firm. I felt meek and humbled yet so fulfilled by caressing them. It was the pinnacle of acceptance, being allowed to intimately fondle this beautiful woman on her well-developed chest. This ardor was magnified greatly when Crystal kissed me, forcing her hot tongue past my lips to connect with mine. An indescribable joy permeated every fiber of my being. It was a rapture far above anything I had ever dreamed about. My tongue danced with Crystal's, slip sliding against hers, savoring the wetness and the subtle force she applied in slow passionate swirling motions. My shallow breathing increased as my eyes closed. I was conscious of my hands touching her breasts but I had no control over the movements. Her dominance was so strong and my submission so complete that I was acting without thought, driven only by the primitive desires of my subconscious and the demands of my Mistress. Time stood still as sensual pleasure enveloped me.

Crystal broke off the kiss, leaning back. She smiled softly as she looked at me for the first time with a tender gaze. My hands were still on her breasts as she reached down to pull the red top up over her head, tossing it on the floor. She then unhooked the clasp in the front of her black lacy bra letting it fall freely behind her. Her breasts were now exposed. I was in awe. They were perfect in every way. My hands were down at my sides while she allowed me to feed my eyes with the sight of her magnificent assets.

"Kiss them, Michael."

I leaned down to take her right nipple into my mouth, sucking it to its full tautness while rubbing the left one between my fingers and thumb. I gorged myself on her mounds of flesh, fulfilling a lifelong craving to experience the sexual power of an older woman with large breasts. I rubbed my face all over them, salivating as I moved back and forth, drowning in carnal intoxication. While I was fully absorbed in this lust, Crystal shifted, sliding her pussy onto my cock, swallowing it deep inside her. I cried out, screeching her name as I felt her moving on me. I was accelerating to climax. Crystal immediately slammed on the brakes.

"You better not come, you little bastard! If you do you'll finish it in your hand. Do you understand me?"

"I'm trying, Ma'am ... I just don't know if ..."

"HOLD ONTO IT, MOTHERFUCKER! DO YOU HEAR ME?" She grabbed my nipples, twisting them viciously, sending a jolt of pain to my brain to help divert the orgasm. The maneuver was successful but my Mistress was not done with me. She stood up, backing off a few feet. She was clearly not pleased.

"I gave you a very simple order to obey: You are not to have a goddamn orgasm. It's very easy to understand. You take orders every fucking day and you follow them to the letter, but when your Goddess gives you one, you resist and try to selfishly do your own thing. You're weak. I'm beginning to wonder if you are really worthy of me, Michael. I'm having my doubts. Maybe you should go jack off in the toilet and leave; perhaps that would be best for you."

I was crushed. The idea of disappointing her was beyond devastating to me. I got off the couch, kneeling before her with my head bowed.

"Please Ma'am, I beg you. Please don't make me go. I'll do anything. I was trying not to come but I was so turned on by you. Please Ma'am, give me another chance. I will do anything to please you. I will do whatever you say, please let me try again."