A Release

The cacophony of sounds illuminated the darkest corners of my mind in achingly sweet relief. First came the sighs – hesitantly released breaths rounding the crispness of the chill air, somehow heating my inner spaces while my skin remained cool to the touch. The feminine sounds of a shuddered inhale came instants after the chocolate rich timbre of contact. Even from my distant vantage I could tell that his fingers were tracing secret places, dark places that were always covered by cloth and custom. Her moan was exquisite.

Ever since that night, oh so long ago, I had wondered what it would be like to make a woman feel the way my brother had made his girlfriend feel. Watching them secretly from the closet was both an amazing danger and an overwhelming excitement. Even though I could not see what they did clearly. I knew, even then, that desire would be an intimate, integral part of my being. Even as my hand crept towards my need, as instinct took over, I understood that it was only a matter of time.

Desire, Lust, Want, Need – however you wish to ascribe words to the sensations that warred within me since that day, were always just beneath the surface – animals without boundaries or borders besides those I knew must be maintained, were forever haunting me. At times I would arrive at my home and secret myself away from my family to touch myself for hours at a time, wishing with the most feral part of me that some young girl would accidentally walk inside and see. And would know my desire as her own.

It never happened. Days passed – women always overlooked me. Perhaps because I controlled my desire too well, hid it so completely that they never understood the ravenous hunger that consumed me. Or perhaps they saw it and it frightened them. Whatever the reason, I've never found a match for my hunger.

What can you say, who will respond? I write this note, pass it along the warp and weft of reality – cast a sweet spell. Is there any who knows desire, true desire? Is there any who would like to feel it press against their every fiber of being – to feel it consume them, to be cherished and comforted by a pure feeling and, at the same moment, to feel the lusciousness of consumption? Can I slide across your tongue, fill your mouth and belly?

Or is it too much?

I wrote the letter on my computer, taking the time to double check every sentence before emailing it. Hotmail took far too long which only frustrated my anxiousness. I was about to post my writing on the most public of places, the Online College Open Writings Forum. I couldn't believe that I finally had the guts to reveal myself in such a way. Nevertheless I chickened out by signing it with my email address, Azrof at hotmail.com rather than my name.

In case you don't know me, I'm Azrof, called Az by my friends. I'm tall, over six feet and an inch and big – I began working out when I was twelve and, as a result, have been gifted with a certain degree of physical power, a power that matches my almost inexhaustible hunger. Well, that's enough about me for now, on with the story.

I submitted to the forum on Saturday in October of 99, when I had just turned 18. It was a fabulous time in my life, I had been in college a decent enough time to know my way around but not long enough to become a total party animal. Being the nerdy, role-playing, recluse I was, becoming a party animal was in doubt. Despite my well-built body I wore glasses and clothing that wasn't designed to fit the contours of my body; I kept away from people who weren't like me and preferred it like that.

The hunger within me kept me awake at nights though, kept me dreaming of a perfect female form. I often chatted online in D\s rooms and other sex chats in those days and in all actuality hoped to meet a girl just like me. How wrong I was.

A week after I submitted the short, after I had all but forgotten about my moment of daring, I received an email from an address at the college. Her screen name was excited4you and her letter basically said,

"Dear Azrof,

"I enjoyed your writing and would like to meet you. Come to the library at 8pm Friday."

The library closes at 8pm on Friday, I thought to myself. Certain that the whole affair was a game set up by my teen-aged pimply role-playing friends I resumed my regular life. I worked out every day at the local gym, did my best to focus on my school work and, of course, role-played as much as possible Sunday.

Friday came quickly enough for me. I was ignoring the strange tingle in my pants, the warmth that kept me erect in class. Even the most intellectually stimulating classes only managed to make my member more enflamed!

After a late dinner at my place, about ten miles away from the college, I drove to the library, certain that I was going there to see if any of my friends were using the public computers. And there she was.

Not the prom queen, but certainly striking, she was beautiful to me. Her eyes, a pale arresting emerald caught me for a long moment before she would allow me to see the rest of her. Her head came to my lips and her body was lithe, skinny except where her more than handful-sized breasts and broad hips appeared. She was pale, spackled with freckles and she was topped with a short crop of dun colored hair. She was wearing a sky blue sundress, leather cowboy boots and matching aviator jacket.

"Hi! Azrof, right?" Her voice was a jolt of electricity, both light and surprisingly friendly.

"Um, Yea…and you're excited for me?" I couldn't help but react shyly, my usually suppressed sexual being taunting me, moving within as if to burst my pants.

"Well, now that I see you…. and your friend, definitely." She winked at me and then very obviously looked down at the bulge in my pants. She rolled her pink tongue past her burgundy painted lips and flicked it upward, drawing it along the line of her flesh as if she was desperately hungry for something. I just blushed and gulped.

"C'mon, I work here in the days and have a key…. we just need to slip in the back." She caught my hand, so much larger than hers, and tugged me along the line of the building. I was so thrilled to make contact that I thoughtlessly ran behind her.

Once at the rear of the building she withdrew a ring of keys from her jacket and opened the Exit door. Without a word she drew me inside and up several flights of stairs and into a study area.

Study areas are glassed in rooms that are made for peace and quiet. People can see in, of course, via the glass but sounds hardly escape no matter how loud they are. She informed me that the cleaning crew had already finished vacuuming upstairs with a playful giggle.

"So…. what are we going to do?" I asked, naively.

"Well, since you don't know you can watch, Mr." She replied, winking at me. Her eyes were dancing then. I'll never forget the knowing look she had as she sat back on the wood table that dominated the center of the room and spread her thighs. She knew about the beast within me.

Her azure sundress hitched up across pale calves, knees and thighs. She didn't even take it slowly; she reached down and tugged it up, revealing the fact that she wore no panties. Only a bare plane of flesh, pierced with mounds of flesh that I recognized as labia.

She was touching them before I could take the time to gasp. Her fingernails, not painted, I noted strangely at that moment, were brushing her flesh expertly, eliciting throaty moans from herself. I know now that her moans were articulated to excite me. They did more than excite me.

Burning warmth spread throughout my body as I watched her, a flow of lava that permeated my every cell and became me. I was a being made only of the heat of lust. My member was so thick and hard I recall, quite vaguely, moaning in pain.

She used that to further her own ends, the little she-devil. She was talking to me then, asking, "Do you like what you see, Azrof? Don't you want to touch, to taste? Tell me Azrof, tell me!" She was demanding and captivating all at once. But she was not dominating me; her words did not entice some hidden submissive within my core, instead they pushed me closer to the edge of giving in to my unbidden desire.

To take. To Own. To Claim flesh for myself. I was growling then and did not know it.

The instant she sank a finger inside herself I saw red. My hands, with a mind almost of their own, moved to her wrists, capturing them. I held her back, against the table and growled into her face. "Fuck me," I said in a half snarl, not really realizing what I was saying or doing.

"Command me…" She responded demurely, a transformation overcoming her so quickly that I almost lost touch with my desire. Almost, but not quite.

"Unzip me, release me from my pants, now!" I released her wrist so she could move, still holding her other hand above her head. Her breasts, not quite so full as they were pulled taunt beneath her dress, were against my chest. They sent tines of lightning into my body seconded only by the sudden implosion of sensation when her fingers unzipped me and pulled my throbbing cock from my pants.

I am a little over seven inches long and around two inches wide, perhaps thicker. Her eyes went wide, not from the length, I suspect, but the girth. "Oh fuck me with your tool, fuck me!" She was panting; her breaths were coming so quickly I felt certain her desire matched mine.

Not really certain what I was doing in practice, having seen it only in porn, I helped my length against her entrance. Then I pushed with all of my might.

It was a breathtaking moment, when my thick cock reamed inside her tight need, filling her so suddenly that the screamed in pleasure and pain. My flesh throbbed within her depths, growing only harder at the sensations of first penetration. A warm, moist grip surrounded my cock, so enticing that I felt certain that IT was tugging me deeper.

Her body was rolling beneath me, undulating up and down of its own accord. Her hips were arching against mine as if I had given her the most pleasurable experience in the world by taking her. Of course I fell instantly in love with her.

After the first thrust I instinctively removed my hold on her wrist and lowered my grip to her hips, taking hold of her so tightly that I left marks. And then, for the first time, I fucked. I slammed and hammered and pounded into her so rapidly that sounds were made, sloppy wet sounds that made the experience only more enticing.

I looked down and watched my length, my cock; vanish inside her pussy as it gripped me tightly. What a sight! My flesh vanishing, becoming one with hers as she accepted it. She accepted me, begged me for more, in fact.

Long minutes passed of steady fucking before my legs started to cramp. I shook my head at her when she gave me a questioning look and moved to lie on the table next to her. "I got a cramp."

"Oh yea? Well, lets see what we can do about that, big guy." She proceeded to clamber on top of me. She knelt around my hips and sat back, her left hand guiding my member into her. As the head sank inside she dropped back, forcing me to enter her fully in a second. I almost screamed. She did.

She instantly began bucking down, grinding into my cock, her hands squeezing her own breasts together through the fabric of her clothing. She was going insane with the pleasure. It was then I realized something was wrong with me; I felt sublime, but not that great. In fact, I didn't really feel that much at all. While it felt amazing to be buried deep inside her, I knew that I could continue for much longer than the mere half an hour we had been going. Determined to cum with my lover I began bucking up into her.

After a few mistakes I managed to match her rhythm with my own, arching my hips up as she sat down down. The sensations quickly grew better, though not overwhelmingly so. We were slapping together louder than ever then, her juices were flowing so that they actually spilt onto my belly; her voice had become a constant scream of pleasure. Then, just when my back was about to give out, she came.

"Fuck me, oh yes, fuck me…oh god, I'm going to…." She was shuddering and writhing beneath me when she did. She screamed her release into the air, putting all of herself into it.

I did not cum. I really didn't feel anywhere near orgasm. While entering her was the singular most enjoyable physical act I had been involved in, I did not feel the boil of need in my balls, the threat of overwhelming joy in my body. I still had a tremendous amount of energy and my cock throbbed with it. I arched up again, trying to stimulate her back into sex.

"No more Az, no more. I'm sore…" She looked up at me emptily, quickly moving away and straightening her dress. "Maybe next time we can make you cum too," she promised. We left the building and parted ways. She never looked back; I did.

I later learned that she was dating a football player.