Part 2: Out of the Closet
When I finally revealed my love of spanking, or more precisely, self spanking, to my husband it was not at all planned. Our two daughters had gone to a friend's birthday party in the afternoon and we got a phone call from the mother hosting the party to ask if it was all right if the girls stayed for the night. We said it was fine and I drove over to drop off pyjamas and toothbrushes. I was back home by late afternoon and Rick and I realised we had a rare evening on our own.
We had a few too many wines over dinner and settled down to watch a movie on Netflix. But I didn't want to watch the movie. I was restless and playful. I began annoying Rick by tickling him, and when that didn't distract him from the movie I jumped up and stood in front of him so he couldn't see the TV.
Finally he gave up and turned off the TV.
"You are impossible," he sighed with a grin. "What am I going to do with you?"
"You could spank me?" I just blurted it out. It wasn't planned and I was as shocked as Rick seemed to be that I had said it.
"Well I am not sure that was what I was thinking."
I was suddenly deflated. But I desperately didn't want to give up. I so much wanted to have my husband involved with my obsession for spanking. It wasn't just the guilt of doing it behind his back. I wanted him involved even though I could only imagine the intense humiliation it would likely cause me.
I gazed intently at Rick.
"What?" he responded quizzically.
I took a very deep breath. "I do want you to spank me," I whispered, intensely embarrassed by what I was saying to my beloved husband and with no inkling of how he would react.
"You what?" he frowned.
I chickened out. I shook my head. "Nothing," I smiled weakly.
It was Rick's turn to gaze at me intently, but I couldn't meet his eye so I looked down at his feet.
"Did you, or did you not, ask me to spank you?" Rick finally requested, but there was no disgust in his voice.
I began to blush, and kept staring at his feet.
"Well?"
"Yes," I whispered nervously.
"A proper spanking?"
"Yes," I again whispered.
"Becky, look at me."
Embarrassed, I lifted my head and stared at my loving husband. I was so overcome with tension that I was shaking and my eyes welled up with tears.
"Are you okay?" Rick enquired with genuine concern.
I nodded my head and tried to give him a reassuring smile. A long silence followed and I could see Rick was trying to assess the situation, like the trained Psychologist he is.
Finally he spoke. "You really want me to do this, don't you?"
Again I just nodded. My heart was pounding. Another long silence followed while Rick seemed to weigh up the situation.
"Tell me?" Rick enquired.
"W..w..what?" I stuttered.
"Tell me exactly what you want?"
I was so ridiculously nervous that I thought I was going to be sick.
"I want you to spank me on my bottom," I muttered nervously, blushing at the shame of what I was saying.
"I want more details than that."
I noticed that Rick had a slightly mischievous grin on his face. I was so utterly embarrassed that a part of me wanted to run and hide somewhere. But I had gone this far and I sensed if I backed out now I would forever regret it.
"I..I want you to put me over your knee and give me a good hard spanking," I paused and took a deep breath to try and settle my nerves, "and I want the spanking to be on my bare bottom."
"Ahhh," Rick grinned, "a good hard spanking on that beautiful naked bottom of yours. Have I got it right?"
"Yes," I mumbled, no longer able to look him in the face.
"And why is it you think you deserve a spanking?"
I was thrown by his question. I just so badly wanted him to do it.
"Why?" I questioned.
"Well I would have thought that if you are asking me to give you a spanking you must have been pretty damn naughty."
My mouth hung open. Rick seemed to be playing right along with my fantasy, or was I just getting my hopes up.
"Well?" Rick enquired when I failed to answer.
Mustering all the courage I could I turned to look Rick directly in the eye again.
"I have been a naughty little slut who deserves to have her bottom thoroughly spanked." In a million years I never imagined I would be saying those words to my husband.
Rick stared at me from where he was seated in the sofa. I was still standing in front of him, having playfully blocked his view of the television. I felt awkward and nervous.
"Well you had better remove those jeans." Rick directed. "Naughty girls don't get to keep their jeans on, do they?"
"No," I mumbled.
With fumbling fingers I unzipped my skin tight jeans and struggled to lower them down my legs. I couldn't believe I was actually doing it. I was so nervous I just about trip over twice before I managed to kick them off my feet.
When I stood back up I suddenly felt very exposed. My husband had seen me naked a million times, but standing in front of him like this was something totally different.
"Now those panties."