It was nightfall, from what I recall it was around seven o'clock. I sat in my car, my hands shaking as I gripped the steering wheel like a vice. I was stressed and angry after a fight during a staff meeting with my manager. It was one of those time that I wished I didn't need to rely on this job so much, that I could if I wanted to flee and never return. But of course at that stage of my life university was a significant part of it, and one cannot have a good career in the future and finances without a part time job to start it all off.
Tears were trickling down my face, I didn't even bother to fix my makeup. How was I supposed to meet Master in the state that I was in? I still have a little self-pride and want to do everything right by Him. I didn't want Him to worry.
I had an hour. The digital clock in my car flashing mockingly at me as time seemed to melt away. I opened my handbag and tried to reapply my lipstick and rouge to touch up the streaks that were left across my cheeks and eyes. I swore to myself while sitting in this car, that I would never wear mascara to work ever again. It seriously was a pain to adjust it. And who was I to impress at work anyway? If anything I should prepare myself always for my Master when I was to meet up with Him or with anyone else for social purposes. I switched on the radio, to calm my nerves. I cannot recall what songs were playing, but as one with a musical ear, I tended to sing along or drum the beat with my fingers, and that seemed to always relax me.
I had shut my eyes and leaned against the car seat. I was caught up in the music. Off handedly I looked at the clock. I was roused in a wave of panic. I only had fifteen minutes to be on His doorstep, ringing His doorbell and His home was about twenty-five minutes away! A million thoughts crossed my mind as if a blur. Should I call Him? Should I try and race there as fast as I could? Maybe I'll get a ticket? Will He know I am upset? Should I tell Him about work? My breathing grew heavy, the tension seemed to overwhelm me as I still sat there in fear and panic. Drive. Drive. I started the engine and sped off towards His house the radio blaring trying to find some way to calm my shot nerves.
I think back on how I was that night. I do not know why I panicked so much, why my feelings were so distraught. My Master understood, if there was a solid reason He didn't hold it against me. But that pang, that notion that I could ever disappoint Him, that He found some fault in me, I believe this was the reason that made me feel in such a way.
I was a few minutes late. I personally thought I had done well considering the traffic and my rampant and nonchalant driving. I parked my car unceremoniously in His driveway and ran with my heels clicking over His paved entrance. I stood at the door silently for a few minutes and tried to breathe while fixing my tousled hair and clothing. Six minutes late. I sighed as I rang the doorbell.
I heard His footsteps across His floorboards. He opened the door and regarded my dishevelled appearance silently. Looking at me up and down. His eyes alone were questioning me. He turned His back to me. "Be as you are, in My study, kneel facing My chair."
"Master Iā¦"
He turned to me His eyes filled with anger. "I hope for your sake you are not about to question Me."
I looked down and quickly made my way upstairs to His study.
I entered the room trembling. He was angry with me. In His silent regard and then in His tone. I knew it. Maybe He will give me a chance to explain? I switched on the light and kneeled before His chair. I closed my eyes and reflected upon the situation. Believe me, I was remorseful. I had never seen Him in anger before. Usually I have been His perfect submissive, I had never ever given Him a reason to be disappointed or angry at me. Tears welled in my eyes, and escaped from me, trickling down my cheeks. I heard Him enter the room, enough time must have passed as my legs were starting to strain from being on the floor for this long. He sat upon His chair, and quietly regarded me. I didn't even dare to look up, I remember concentrating on the rug.
"While you were sitting here thinking upon your actions and your behaviour, I took the time to investigate why My usually obedient and loyal submissive has forgotten My rules."
I don't know how I looked to Him, but I seemed to grow paler as His words progressed, my tears flowing more freely.
"Firstly." He paused. "You were six minutes late. Don't even try to talk your way out of that one. You know the rule. If you are to be late, you are to call Me irregardless of the situation. Pull over if need be. That is why you have your mobile phone with you is it not?"
"Secondly." He paused. "Did you even take note of how you parked your car? It is irresponsible and I do not find it befitting for you to park it that way in My driveway. Also I found these." He emphasised on the word 'these' as He threw my keys on the floor before me. "You left your car unlocked, and the keys in the ignition. At least you remembered to switch the engine off. What if someone stole it? What then? Your carelessness cannot be overlooked."
I wanted the floor to swallow me up at this point.
"Thirdly." He sighed. "You enter My house, and do not even kneel when you enter, to wait for Me to give you instructions. Instead you stand before Me, and dare to look at Me in the eye and QUESTION Me even though you knew of your indiscretions."
He paused for the longest time, perhaps wanting me to measure up His words. "You may try and give Me an explanation if you choose to." I heard Him lean back against His chair. "Look at Me."
I looked up at Him, my eyes red from crying, the tears flowing. The pent up anger and disappointment flowed through me at this moment.
"Stop crying and talk to Me. What happened?" He spoke gently for the first time this evening.
"Master, I know that whatever I may say is an excuse to You, and I am to blame for my actions alone. I was irresponsible and careless and I should not have bought the rage and anger that was within me from work to You Master. My mind was clouded and I had a lapse of memory. I just...all I wanted was to come to You Master and speak to You of my day, and to find reassurance. I cannot ask for that while I treated You so disrespectfully and had no regard for Your rules."
"So work was the cause of Your disrespect to Me?"
