A Day of Self Denial

His tongue was on my clit. Again and again the warm, wet roughness of it flicked across that button of flesh, making me rise higher and higher into a familiar plane of excitement. I was moaning and groaning with a pleasure that began to feel like an aching agony of wanting to cum. Ron knew how to make me cum. He knew me like a book he'd written himself. He could make me cum fast or slow, tease me for a half an hour or make me shudder with an orgasm within minutes, however he chose. Every sound I made, every movement of my body as I tensed or relaxed, told him how close I was to cuming.

He loves hearing me scream in the catharsis of my orgasm, but he didn't really need me to tell him I was getting close. Very close. I could feel the blood surging in my cunt, hot and throbbing. I couldn't ignore how swollen and hard my clit felt as he ran his tongue over it again and again. My heart was racing and I wanted to grind my pelvis into his face to push myself over the brink into release.

Suddenly though, with a shock to my system, Ron stopped. Stopped cold. I sank back and tried to catch my breath, tried to calm the racing in my mind, the confusion of the moment, sensations at cross purposes.

Let me explain. Ron has been my lover for almost six months now and I am still constantly enthralled with the man. We enjoy pushing our boundaries sexually and are always trying something new to surprise and delight one another. Trust is so complete between us that we are accustomed to saying "Yes" to almost any suggestion.

"Can I tie you up?"

"Sure."

"Can I fuck you in the ass?"

"Sure."

"Can I spank you?"

"Sure."

These are things we have each said and done to each other. So when Ron told me he was going to be in charge one day last week and that, furthermore, he was going to keep me on the edge of excitement all day long but not let me cum, I agreed to go along with the experiment in self denial. After all, our occasional master/slave relationship is based on acquiescence, not coercion. I willingly give up power to him by choice.

Everything, after all, is a choice. I choose how much I eat each day. I choose to be living with Ron. I choose to let him be my master sometimes sexually, knowing that if I need to, all I have to say is "Stop" and he will honor it. I rarely say it. I rarely say "No" either, choosing, rather, to trust him and try whatever it is he wants me to do.

Part of it is knowing he loves me deeply and would never intentionally harm me. Oh, he might get excited now and then and pinch my nipples a little too hard and make them hurt a bit for a second or spank me a few too many times and make my ass sting like hell for a minute, but never would be really do me any damage. Of that I am certain.

So, one mere day without an orgasm, if that's what he wanted to do, was OK with me. I was happy to go along with the program and just enjoy being continually turned on over and over all day, knowing that undoubtedly, the following day we would go back to our usual habit of having such great sex that I cum over and over and over again till I'm flooded with such intense sensations that it feels like my whole body is going to explode when the orgasms build one on top of the other.

Ron is amazing. Wonderful. He's the best, the sexiest, the most enthusiastically attentive lover I've ever had. I feel spoiled and pampered and continually dumbfounded at how much pleasure he seems to get out of giving ME pleasure. So, I knew I was in for it. A whole day of tantalizing sex without the usual satisfaction. But that was all right because that's what he wanted to do and I like letting him have his way. That may not sound surprising unless you know how fiercely independent I used to be. I NEVER use to let men tell me what to do in or out of bed, so this is all still quite new for me. Maybe that's part of the allure—finding someone I love enough and trust enough to let go and let them take over. Complete capitulation.

I've let him do things to me I've never done before. I've done things to him I've never done with anyone else. We've done things new for him for the first time too. And every time we pass one of those boundaries it just makes me feel closer to Ron, to love him more, to feel more excited, more turned on by a single passionate kiss when he gets home from work each day because it is full of the promise and potential of every sexual encounter we have shared so far in this wild six months.

So, one second his tongue was on my clit with me on the brink of a shattering orgasm and the next second I felt an intense let down, a sudden absence of sensation that left me with a different type of tingle. It was almost like a shadow, a ghost of a shiver that left my cunt feeling amazingly horny but somehow very much alive.

It was a stunning contrast and since I had chosen to go along with this day of self denial I had decided not to get all bent out of shape with frustration. This was going to be a live-in-the-moment, a go-with-the-flow day. It wasn't hard to remember though, how years ago with any of several former lovers, getting to that almost-cuming place of intense excitement and then find the guy suddenly asleep next to me in the bed.

The next thing I felt after that, then, was the fingers of my own right hand on my clit while I masturbated to orgasm rather than lay there feeling horny and abandoned. Ron was not abandoning me though. We were just pushing the envelope on step further. Seeing how much teasing I could take and how I would handle it, handle letting him be in command. Well, so far so good. But the day was young and I didn't know what more he had in store for me really. I just had trust.

"Go make me breakfast, Jane. Bacon and eggs. Hurry up now," Ron said to me, seconds after his tongue had left my cunt. His mouth and chin was still glistening—shiny with saliva and pussy juice. I couldn't quite believe my ears and didn't jump up out of bed fast enough to suit him so he encouraged me with a quick slap on my ass.

That got my attention and I realized he was serious. He WAS going to be my master for the day and go through with this plan of getting me excited but stopping just short of letting me cum every time. The full reality of it finally sank in. He was going to order me around all day and tease the daylights out of me sexually.

I quickly thought over my options. Call a halt to the whole thing and bow out of the idea or give it a try and see what it felt like to CHOOSE to not cum for just one day. It took me less than a second to arrive at my decision. Try it! The thought of pushing my limits once again with Ron turned me on immensely.

So, I said a demure, "Yes Dear," and hopped off the mattress and pulled on a tee shirt that was nearby to ward off the chill of the kitchen since I knew the fire in the wood burner was undoubtedly out, leaving the house cold that morning. I rustled up breakfast. A short order chef couldn't have done it faster. In record time I had the table set and food ready to eat, tea made with sugar and milk just the way Ron likes it.

And so our day began. I had made my choice and was determined to enjoy our day together. Ron works long hours during the week so every time we have the luxury of an entire day together, it is sheer heaven. We have fun. We make each other laugh. We can be serious or silly or quiet—anything is OK. We've cried on each other's shoulder and told each other secrets that no one else knows. So this was going to be one more day of building memories together.

While I was doing the breakfast dishes, washing the frying pan to be specific, Ron came up behind me and kissed me on the neck as he often does. I love it when he does this. It makes me purr inside with delight. Maybe I even purred out loud. I don't really know, all I know is that that particular kiss gave me goose bumps down the left side of my body and I turned, pan in hand, toward Ron to kiss him back.

He pulled me into his face with one of his strong hands behind my neck and half a second later his tongue was searching for mine inside my mouth. My tongue tried to wrap itself around his without any thought on my part, just lust. I was horny and I wanted him badly. I put the frying pan down and reached for his crotch, feeling for his cock and was delighted to find it hard as a rock inside his silk boxer shorts.

He took my hands and led me into the bedroom. By the time we got to the bed my tee shirt was off and I was so happy I nearly jumped onto the top of the still unmade tangle of sheets. Ron yanked down his shorts and pulled off his own tee shirt, approaching me from the foot of the bed, his huge hard-on in his right hand. Gleefully, I lay back and spread my raised knees as far apart as I could, inviting him into my hungry cunt.

The moment before Ron starts to fuck me is one I relish. It is a moment of anticipation full of delight because I know how indescribably fabulous it's going to feel when he starts pounding his long thick prick into me. He is so big around that he fills me up completely, stretching the walls of my pussy to their limit.

As he began to push his cock into my cunt, I once again let out a gasp as the sheer size of his member felt like it was going to nearly rip me open. I grabbed onto his ass with both hands and pulled him into me as hard as I could, wanting him in me as deeply as possible. Every part of my cunt was getting stroked and massaged by his dick. His cock rubbed the inside of my pussy, every surface of it identifiably aware in my senses. I could feel him on the upper side of my cunt, the bottom, the sides, everywhere all at the same time.

Knowing I like it when he fucks me hard and deep, Ron was banging the hell out of me and I was loving it. Every time his pelvis hit my body, the head of his cock dove deep into me and his crotch slammed against my clit. With each forward movement of his hips, I got more and more turned on. The sensation of him rubbing the inside of my cunt and stimulating my clit at the same time was fantastically exciting.

"Oh, God, that feels good, baby," I told him, hoping he would change his mind and keep fucking me till I came. Then he did one of my favorite things. He swung my legs up over his shoulders, raised up his body so it was vertical and started to fuck me as fast as he could. Heaven. He knew damn well that got me hot fast and that I often cum that way without him even having to touch my clit with his fingers.

I was hoping, praying he would just keep it up for another minute. That was all I was going to need to cum. I was that close, that turned on. I could feel the orgasm building in my cunt. The feeling of pressure was building up inside, the delicious ache, the tingles that start down my legs just before I explode.

Suddenly, Ron looked right into my eyes and smiled. Then, just as suddenly, he yanked himself back, pulling his cock out of my cunt and sat back on his heels. "Shit," I thought to myself, and I felt my heart start to slow down and felt the void inside my cunt where a moment ago I had felt fullness and warmth.

Then I caught myself up short and remembered what today was suppose to be all about. Change your perception, I told myself. Today is about getting turned on, not about cuming. You were just very turned on, Jane. That was a fabulous few minutes of sexual excitement. You enjoyed it. Just keep enjoying it all day and learn the lesson. Orgasm is not everything. Being excited is a joy in itself.

So, again, I renewed my choice to let Ron be in charge and run the show. I laughed out loud at the joy of it, the joy of giving up control. Suddenly this was fun and I liked it. I sat up and kissed Ron on the mouth and smiled, relishing the look in his eyes. It was a look that told me he loved me without having to say a word. God, how I love this man!

So, the day went. We would do this or that for a while--watch TV, go on the computer, read a book, then Ron would lead me back to the bed for more play time. "I'm going to eat your pussy now," he announced at one point.

"Yum," I thought to myself. There's nothing much in life I like better than Ron's tongue on my pussy. It's divine pleasure, the warmth, the sensations he gives me, that go right through me. He drives me wild running his tongue up and down the length of my cunt to my clit, over and over again till I nearly cum, then he concentrates on my clit to get me off in an explosion of excitement and satisfaction.

But not that day. Nope. Merely to the edge but never over it. I didn't even have to tell him I was getting close. He just knew and stopped short. Over and over again for I don't know how long, he kept bringing me to the edge of the precipice and then backing off just in time. I'd sigh and sink back onto the bed, relaxing my tensed muscles, then he'd start in again, that searching, knowing tongue, persistently caressing my clit, making me climb the walls with feeling of indescribable pleasure.

If I hadn't decided to give in to it, to CHOOSE to have this day of self-denial, it would have been torture. It would have been hell. It would have been the ultimate in frustration and probably would have pissed me off like crazy—but it didn't because I had decided to enjoy it for what it was—a whole day of foreplay.

So, it was fabulous. It was a trip to a new place in my body and in my head. And best of all it was a new trip with Ron and that's what I love most of all about what we do for each other. We let each other be our genuine selves. We let each other do what we really want to do and be who we really want to be without judgments or limits. So I thoroughly enjoyed Ron licking my pussy and playing with my nipples and kissing me and fucking me all day long without cuming once.

Never thought I'd say or do that in my life, but there you go. Surprise, surprise. Amazing the responses that come out of love and trust.

That evening we had plans to have dinner and hear some live jazz about an hour and a half away from home. We had to leave by 6:30 to make our 8:00pm dinner reservations. This was a musician Ron really liked a lot and I had heard one of his CD's and knew he was good so I was psyched to hear him live.

Before leaving home though, we had other plans. We were hoping some porno DVD's we had ordered would come in the mail that afternoon at 1:30. Unfortunately the postman was overwhelmed with mail after Thanksgiving's holiday and the mail was late so we went out for a cup of coffee.

When we got done and checked the mail, we were disappointed. No DVD's. "Oh well," I said. "Let's put in one of our old sexy movies." We did and started fooling around.

"Suck my cock," Ron ordered me in a demanding tone of voice. Now I love sucking this man's cock for several reasons so usually he doesn't even have to ask, let alone demand, but I took it in the spirit of the day and happily complied. I slurped his cock into my mouth and got it nice and wet then slipped a silver cock ring onto him and slid it down to the base of his luscious prick.

He had taught me how to do this. Another of my "firsts". I'm getting better at it.

One of the reasons I like giving Ron head is the sheer pleasure of the feel of his silky smooth cock in my mouth. It's delicious. The taste of his pre-cum is wonderful too. Sweet and salty at the same time. I love it and he knows it. As for his creamy thick cum, well, hell that's my favorite moment on earth. There is nothing I like better than the feeling of this man cuming in my mouth, swallowing his hot semen.

It's the most intimate moment possible. I can't get any closer to him than that and that thrills me. I can't give him any more pleasure than that and that thrills me. He has told me that cuming in my mouth makes his orgasms more intense and that thrills me. So when after an hour of sucking and fucking and doing everything possible we could think of while we watched porn, Ron came in my mouth, well, that was the high point of my day, hands down. Nothing beats that moment. I'd give up a dozen orgasms of my own to have him cum once in my mouth.

We jumped out of bed and into the shower to hurry and get ready just in time to drive to the dinner club. On the way, while Ron drove, he kept ordering me to do various things. First I had to unzip my coat. Then I had to hike my skirt up so my bare ass was on the leather car seat. Then it got really serious.

"Masturbate," he told me. And he wasn't kidding around. He told me to play with myself as hard and as fast as I could but to make sure I didn't cum. I had to stop before I came. When my breathing got hard and fast and I started to whimper, Ron ordered me to stop.

"Take your hand away from your cunt and pinch your nipples ten times as hard as you can." Over and over again on the drive to the club, this went on. I would get so close that one more minute would do it, I'd come if I kept it up and so I'd have to force myself to pull my hand away quickly before it was too late.

It was hard to do. I really wanted to cum by then and it took every ounce of self control I owned to manage it but I did. I started to hope we would hurry up and get to the restaurant so that the torture would be over. Finally I saw the street sign. Wyoming Ave. Hallelujah! We were there. Surely Ron wouldn't expect me to masturbate during dinner.

And dinner was delicious. Ron had a Creole jambalaya pasta that had a hot seasoned sauce and I had a tender pork chop with pureed yams and collards greens cooked to perfection. We both drank beer with our dinners and ordered New Orleans style desserts to treat ourselves in a decadent manner that we seldom indulge in.

The music didn't start till 10:15 instead of 9:30, but when it started, WOW! Instantly the room was transformed into a concert hall and the sound pervaded all else. It was worth the drive, worth the wait, worth the price. It was real music and they were real musicians who kept up a driving beat and an unassailable pace of song after song. Rhythm, melody, words, pounding beat of the bass that literally vibrated through my chair and into my pantyless cunt thrilling both my ears and my pussy.

I had on one of my sexiest of outfits. Ron had bought me everything I wore. Black high heeled boots. Black saucy skirt. White lace blouse with long sleeves and ruffles and no bra. My breasts and nipples were openly exposed befitting our most sexual of days. Other men in the room stared at my tits all night. It had been twenty years since I had gone out in public in a see-through blouse without a bra. Ron loves me this way so I am finally convinced I still look good. I am beginning to see myself through his eyes. I know I used to be beautiful. Now I am starting to believe I still am.

Like I said, amazing what love can do. Such as, it will make me obey even when at first I balk. Ron told me to pinch my nipples as we sat there waiting for our dessert and at first I said "NO!" Then he explained that I could cross my arms and no one would see me do it so after a moment or two to reconsider I gave in and did it. It felt scary, like I was being naughty, but a little exciting even though it made me anxious. The second and third time it wasn't so frightening, just thrilling and amusing to be sitting there dressed provocatively doing something so flagrantly sexual in public.

When we left the club it was about a quarter to midnight. Ron made another one of his announcements. This one I liked a lot. He told me that as soon as we got into the car I was suppose to start masturbating and keep it up till midnight and to go ahead and cum. In fact, I had to keep going after I came and keep coming as many times as I could.

"And scream it out when you cum. I want to hear it," Ron explained. All right! Hallelujah again! Never did I so willingly comply with an order. As soon as we got into the car, I buckled up my seat belt and my right hand went right to my pussy. I put my middle finger in my cunt to get it wet with my juices and started to rub my clit in tight little circles as fast as I could, knowing it wouldn't take very long to cum after a whole day of such prolonged and repeated excitement. Then Ron told me to use the other hand to pinch my nipple.